Continued

Now I’m the kind of person who for years prided myself on enjoying happy hours, wine festivals, cocktail parties, or just going out for a drink with the girls.  I also knew that during my many years of dating and not finding anyone who returned my feelings my drinking habits had gotten out of control. 

Friday, Sept 9, 2005 was my 49^th birthday and the day our cruise ended.  My best friend Vicky picked me up at the airport and we took off for a great little Mexican restaurant.   Over dinner and 2 margaritas’ I told her of the entire trip and all the people I’d met.  I even told her of how Kirt had talked about his sobriety at Papas N Beer.

That weekend I’d made a decision, not unlike the one I’d made to quit smoking back in 1988.  Beginning on Monday I began the long process of cutting down on my alcohol intake.  By this time I was drinking easily a 6 pack a night, alone.  I’m very proud to say I still to this day, do not drink ¼ of what I used to.

During the second week of Oct I received a very surprising phone call.  Kirt from San Diego was on the phone and wanted to catch up.  I’d kept in touch with Lisa but had no idea she had been talking with Kirt as well.   We had the most amazing talk and the call lasted almost 3 hours.

It had just a few days and Kirt kept calling.  I was thrilled to say the least!  It was at this time he invited me to join him for the weekend, at the beach house his family had rented in Mission Beach.  I of course immediately yes.  I had not turned down any chance that had come across my door for a real chance of a relationship.

I had not had any luck in the lasting relationship these many years, so with this in mind, I told no one who I was meeting.  I explained I was staying with a girl friend and it was just a simple weekend trip to San Diego.  I told myself, I didn’t want to jinx it by speaking out aloud about to anyone.  Call me superstitious, yep that’s me.

I arrived in San Diego and Kirt; true to his word I had my own room at the beach house.  We had a great time.  We talked for hours and walked to the beach and watched the sunset.  Then of all things we saw a pod of dolphins just a little ways out from the beach.  Kirt said in all his many years in San Diego, he’d never seen a pod that close to the beach before.  It was amazing!

I returned from my weekend knowing I wanted to see Kirt again.  I could feel we had sparks between us and knew he felt the same.  Thus began the almost daily phone calls.  Thank goodness he had free long distance, we should really thank ole ma bell for that.

During one of Kirts many calls in early Nov that he said he was making a trip for business to Phoenix and could we meet up.  I said “hell yea” that I even had a week off just before Thanks Giving, I’d “love to see him again”. 

Kirt told me he’d booked he’s trip for 3 days.  It wasn’t but a few short days later he called and asked me if he could stay with me for 5 instead.  Again my answer was, “yes”.  This was holiday time and the weather was fabulous this time of year.  Kirt and I decided to visit the Botanical Gardens since they had a butterfly event happening.  We had a great time watching and learning about all the different butterflies.

It was during this visit that I truly began to have very deep feelings for Kirt.  We talked for hours and hours.  I found myself wanting to know more about him.  What had made up this man from San Diego? Kirt was very open about his previous marriage and I was too.  However, Kirt’s was much more involved since he had ended a 26 year marriage with his first wife.  My ex-husband and I only lasted 5 ½ years.  Not much comparison there.

By the time Christmas was close Kirt and I wanted to spend as much time together as the traveling would allow.  We chose to have Christmas Eve at my place, and then I’d fly over to San Diego and spend New Years with him and his family.

Meeting Kirt’s family was a huge thing for me.  I hadn’t gotten along with my previous in-laws and was nervous about meeting them.  Kirt flew me over during the second weekend of December 2005.  He’s family has belonged to numerous car clubs and he wanted me to join him at the Horseless Carriage Club luncheon.  I’d never been around anyone who was into antique cars, I was fascinated!  But before the luncheon, I was to have dinner with his mom, dad, sister and brother-in-law.  The entire family was meeting at Anthony’s, thank god; I adored a great seafood dinner.

I looked at the cloths I’d brought and thought, ugh, these will never work!  Kirt and I took off for the nearest mall; I ended up with a smart new pair of black slacks. I had begun to love the Kirt could fix just about anything. 

Dinner introductions were made and we all ordered dinner.  Kirt had already explained that he sister Debbie also was a recovering alcoholic and her husband Chad no longer drank as well.  The only two at the table with a cocktail were his mom and dad.  I am naturally very shy at heart, even though most people would disagree.  I kept very quiet, not speaking unless spoken to.  It had been many years for me to be taken to “meet the family” as it were and I my nerves were dancing.   I was thinking, “I could use a drink bout now”.  Before the main meal was over, the biggest shock of the night happened.  Lear, Kirt’s father looked right at me and asked; “so you wanna be a Simpson, huh?”  My face flushed and I stammered for an answer.  Truthfully, not much came out; a giggle of nervousness and something like, “I hadn’t thought about it”.  The rest of the family simply stared and after an awkward silence, the night progressed on to dessert.  This evening brings back fond memories of meeting my future family.  I knew during this weekend that it was time for Kirt to meet my family.  Oh dear, what a thought!

First Post

So they say, "this is the first day of the rest of your life"; can it be just that simple? 


That was the question I thought I answered back on July of 2006, as I answered the question with a "yes".


My leap of faith began when I said yes and married the man I'd fallen in love with in the beginning of 2007.  This jump would include a complete change of everything; from moving away from my home, my son, my friends and all that I'd worked for since being single for the past 20 some years. The funny or strange thing about fate is, I'd be moving back to a location I'd left as a teenager in 1972.  Who knew right?


The powers that be seemed to know I'd be back, don't ask me how, they just knew.

I had been divorced for more than 20 yrs and thought I had tried just about everything on the dating scene.  I tried family, friends and even had joined a multitude of on line dating services, you’ve all heard their famous ads on TV & radio. 

Something caught my eye while surfing the net one afternoon and before I knew it, I was booked on a singles cruise. It was Jan 2005 and it had only been since Aug of 2002 that I had bought my house; needless to say money was not plentiful for me.  The cruise line however offered to find anyone that needed a cabin mate to help split the cost.  That bill fit me to a tee. 

The cruise was scheduled for the Labor Day holiday and being I’d never cruised before I was asking everyone I knew questions.  They were all very helpful even though a bit taken back by my announcement.  “How could I possibly go by myself?”  This was the question all my friends were asking, “wasn’t  I scared”?  I told them nope, not me!

When the cruise was about a month away, the web site in charge opened up a chat room for all who were on board for this singles event.  I found that to be fun and exciting; talking to all these people who I was soon to meet.  Most everyone posted photos so we could find each other once on the ship.  I was lucky enough to meet one the nicest people in the world and she is now one of my very best friends!  This was to be Lisa’s first cruise as well, she however opted to get a cabin my herself  and we ended up and different decks of the ship. 

Lisa and I began talking on the phone before the cruise and decided to hang with each other while on the cruise.  This worked out great for both of us, we seemed to calm each other while having a grand time cruising and meeting people.

Our first stop happened to be in San Diego and low & behold another singles cruiser, Kirt had told everyone this was his home port .  I hadn’t even planned to get off the ship since I had lived here before and moved away in Aug of 1972.  Then Kirt announced at breakfast he was renting a car and would be tour guide for anyone who wanted to join him.  Well hell, myself  and 2 other ladies immediately volunteered.  I thought why not, you only live once and I’ll just go where ever the others decided. 

It so happened to be a beautiful day in San Diego and Kirt had gotten a white convertible for the day’s  drive.  I set up front and Freda and Lucy set in back.  We ended up driving over to the Hotel Del Coronado and Lucy told us she had a picture of a ghost in the photo of her being there before.  We all said “sure you do”.  It is a grand place with wonderful history behind it, I recommend it for everyone.

Then it was on to the famous Gas Lamp district for some shopping for Freda.  This as it turns out was to be the funniest thing about the day.  You see, our tour guide and resident of San Diego got lost!  Yes, he was lost and couldn’t find it to save him.  Well to say he was frazzled is the least of it, he also had 3 women laughing and teasing him.  This however seemed to please him immensely.

That was the beginning of our cruise.  The end was in Ensanada  and somehow we all ended up at the famous Papa’s N Beer.  If you’ve been there, then no explanations are needed.  As we all set around drinking and having a blast, another singles cruiser, Pat asked Kirt why he no longer drank.  Kirt had already told us ladies he didn’t drink, but no of us had asked the “whys” of it. 

I listened to Kirt tell his story while we all set there holding our cocktails.  I had not heard anyone speak before like him about the misery of alcoholism.  My first husband and one of my dearest aunts had been an alcoholic.  I hung on every word he said.  This was to be the beginning of the changes that were to come.

When it was time to disembark from the cruise we all said our good byes and promised to keep in touch.  Lisa and I exchanged numbers and I knew we would keep in touch even though she lived in San Francisco and I lived in Phoenix.